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INDICTED WORLDCOM EXECS LAUNCH "PRISONCOM" Exclusive Prison Will Be For Convicted CEOs New Yawk, NY - (GNS) - Worldcom executives Jack B. Nimble and Jack Bequik announced plans to build several exclusive prisons for convicted CEOs around the country. "There's a growing market for this," Nimble said. "Friends in the federal government have already assured us of the financing," Bequik said. Justice Department officials estimate that over one thousand corporate executives will be convicted of crimes against integrity over the next two to three years. "And you can't put all of them in one prison. It'd be like The Great Escape," Nimble said. "You gotta spread 'em out or you'll be faced with the greatest corporate criminal minds in history all working together on some gigantic Ponzie scheme." Attorney General John "Holy Roller" Ashcroft denied having any connection to the plan, but conceded Nimble had a point about bunching all the cons together. "You would think that a Bible lesson and one good thrashing would do the trick," he said. "I mean, they're not dope-dealers or traitors." Nimble said if his appeals proceed as expected, the first prison will be ready when it's time for him to serve. |
