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MISSILE TEST SUCCEEDS!
New Arms Race Underway
Bonn, Germany - (GIN) - Within minutes after the Pentagon announced the U.S. missile test succeeded, governments began gearing up, factories began to rumble, and orders started pouring in to arms makers around the world, signalling the beginning of what many experts call the biggest arms race yet.
    But many arms race market watchers considered it close.
    "If that test hadn't worked, it would've set this race back years," said one arms dealer who wished not to be identified.
    "Hey, you got a system in place where everybody can blow everybody up, mutually assured destruction, MAD, and everybody starts backing away from production. Everybody's talking peace. Very bad for business," he said.
    "But you got a new system that puts an end to that stalemate, undermines that treaty, and suddenly everybody wants a piece. It's heaven," the arms dealer said.
    "It's beautiful," said another arms dealers at the SDI convention in Bonn. "Now everybody's got to worry about somebody launching a ballistic missile at them, so they've got to have the shield. And the great thing about this is, it can't be undone by that MAD approach," he said.
    Experts project this arms race can only be undone by severely distorting national economies until the financial stability and social well-being of enough nations jeopardizes production.
    "But that could take awhile, and the money in the meantime, well, it's a green light for the green," he said.