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KIDS CONFUSED; IS BUSH A PRESIDENT
OR A BEER?
Ann Arbor, MI - (GNS)
- Polls conducted by the University of Michigan Sociology Department & Football Team show youths are confused by and about President Bush.
     Most think Bush is a beer.
     When asked "What is Bush?", 37% replied, "Beer." Twenty-one percent replied, "Beer, man." And 12% replied, "Yo, it's a beer." Four percent replied, "It's lousy beer."
     Only 18% replied with an answer that included the word "president", but forty-six percent of those said, "It's a beer that ran for president."
     When asked, "Who is the president?", 67% answered, "That's a good question." Twelve percent said they thought it was someone from Florida. Eight percent said they thought The Rock should be president.
     Only ten percent got the answer right.
     When asked about the recent flip-flops and foreign policy shifts regarding China, many said, "Yeah, I don't drink beer made in China. I think it's made from sweat, you know, in the shops where they make these shoes I'm wearing, see?"
     Some said, "It's confusing." And nearly no one said, "It marks a dangerous direction, and is a clear indication that this administration has no real foreign policy."
     When asked about bipartisanship and civility, an overwhelming number denied being bipartisan, but said bipartisans ought to have equal rights.
     Youths split almost evenly, 52%-48% over whether or not beer makes one more or less civil.
     "If I drink a little, I'm mellow. If I drink alot, I'm mean. But if I get shitfaced, I'm outta here," said one youth.
     When asked about Anhauser, eighty-one percent said he was Vice President.