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CONSTITUTIONAL SCHOLARS DEBATE NEW FREE SPEECH ISSUE Is It Legal To Shout "Opiate Gas" In A Crowded Theater? Cambridge, MA - (GNS) - In a hastily-called conference of scholars of the US Constitution, a debate raged over the legality of shouting "Opiate Gas" in a crowded theater. "Congress shall make no law abridging freedom of speech," declared Professor Peter Zenger of the Old School at the University Of Pennsylvania. "There are community standards, there are limits," argued Bill Bennett, Commentator Without Portfolio. "The question that was never resolved is, is it an excercise of free speech to shout 'fire' in a crowded theater?" said Dr. Harcourt Brace, of the Harvard School of Questions. "Is it free speech to shout 'theater' in a crowded fire?" asked Abbott Hoffman, Professor Emeritus of the Yippie School of Government, also at Harvard. "And what if the theatre isn't crowded?" asked Brace. The debate continued long into the evening, without resolution. Attendees were arrested for violating curfew. |
