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POLICE FIND EVIDENCE OF STEM CELL RESEARCH IN CONDIT'S HOME Washington, D.C. - (GNS) - Sources within the Know reported early this morning that the boxes removed from Rep. Gary Condit's contain massive amounts of evidence that the congressman was conducting stem cell research. "We're just as suprised as you are," the Police Chief Bilyard Magoo said. Condit's lawyer, Abbe Magoo, said the evidence was planted. "This is an effort to frame my client and draw attention away from other distractions," Magoo said. Magoo said the evidence was planted by the people who want to keep stem cell reseach on the front burner. A senator who wished to remain nameless said he was hoping evidence of plans to oppose campaign finance reform were found. "Then that issue would be on the front burner, where it belongs." Police are searching the evidence, including the front burner of the stove, for fingerprints, DNA, tiny hairs, small pieces of fabric, and illegal narcotics. "We're checking everything but the rocker panels," police said. |
