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ANIMATED GREEN SNOT TOPS BOX OFFICE Hollywood, CA - (UGP) - An animated green snot figure known as Shrek has jumped to the top of the box office and is the toast of Hollywood these days, according to outgoing Mayor Dick "Richard" Riordan's Toast Of The Town Director, Tiffany Shill. "It's so great," she said. "Everyone wants to be seen with him. He's truly bringing us all together." "It's unexpected that green snot would have such a cultural impact," said media curio Michael Medved. "It's so infantile, yet so compelling, and universal." Medved said Shrek is Yiddish for snot. "I think he's adorable," said former TV commentator Dr. Laura Schlesinger. "But, seriously, if this is what it takes to entetain people without violence or the 's' word, then I'm all for it." "I still prefer my pet rock," declared cultural grump David Horowitz, "and I'm not just saying that because I want to be different or because the Pet Rock industry has me on their payroll." Shrek will be getting a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame next week, will star in the next Star Wars movie, and is rumored to be making plans to challenge Gray Davis for governor in 2004. |
